Grammar matters

Me: L, what do you want for your birthday cake?

L: Abe Lincoln riding a bear with an assault rifle. Or a bear riding a shark.

Me: Do you want the bear to have the assault rifle or do you mean you want Lincoln to have it?

L: I don’t know. Whatever works

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So, I am pretty sure L got the suggestion for the Lincoln/rifle/bear combo from his dad. I know the bear riding a shark is from L because those are his two favorite things. I don’t yet know what his cake will be, but I promise there will be pictures. 

I did find this awesome picture from SharpWriter on deviantART:

Next he might tackle dibision

Me: L, your birthday is three weeks from today!

L: 21 days?

Me: (Excited because Obviously my 5 year old is a math genius) How did you know that? When did you learn multiplication?

L: Yesterday it was 22 days. What is multiplitation?

The Exterminator- Welcome to morning in our house!

L: M! I found a LIVE BUG in our bathroom. It is not a spider.

M: What is it? A roach? A roly poly? A water bug?

L: I don’t know what it is. Come get it. /shudders

M: /sigh. Let me get a cup and plate. 

L: Why don’t you kill it?

M: /glares at L, gets bug, and takes it out side.

L: I would have killed it.

M: Yeah right. You can’t get close to a bug without a freakout. Asides, killing bugs is childish; Just put them back in their habitat.

L: /shudders. Bugs are so gross.

 

 

 

 

 

 

A ghost story

In an attempt not to go a month between posts, I decided to show you an old video of M telling a ghost story. She is about 3 1/2 in this video. Please ignore the messy messy bedroom. We were in the process of moving and things were a wreck!

Moral Stance

This Friday at school, both M and L are supposed to dress up like a literary character. M is going as Junie B. Jones, and I have been working with L on his costume ideas. He wanted to be a “Marvel comic guy,” but he doesn’t care which one. I think that is a little boring, so I have been trying to convince him to be a character from Harry Potter.

Me: L, why don’t you be Draco Malfoy? You have blonde hair like him.

L: Malfoy? The bad kid?

Me: Yeah, the kid in Slytherin.

L: (taking my face in his hands) I could not ever be Malfoy. He is very bad and I can not be him. I will be Harry.

He then gave me a look that made me feel like I had just committed the worst sin possible. I guess he’s gonna be Harry.

Like a sentence with no words…

In reference to a play she is writing:

M: I am warning ya’, this play has no pictures in the illustrations.

You better let HER press the elevator buttons

We went on a vacation over Spring Break and M wanted to push the elevator buttons. Sadly, she is slower than her brother and he pushed the button first. This is what M doodled later:

Dont piss her off

If it’s healthy, it must be gross.

L: Mommy, can I please, please, Please have another gummy?

Me: No, those are vitamins.

L: Wait, you mean healthy stuff?

Me: Yep.

L: I KNEW I didn’t Really like those.

Being a kid is not so lucrative.

Daddy: L, get up.

L: Whhhhhyyyyyyy do you always have to sit here?

D: It’s my spot.

L: Why can’t I have a spot?

D: Buy a couch.

L: Daaaaaaddddd, I can’t; I’m a kid!

D: Get a job.

L: What can I do? I am a kid?

M: You could be a kid artist!

L: I fink there is not so much money in art.

M: You could be a Japanese Fighter or a Bullfighter in Spain!

L: I fink maybe I will just move.

I know what a Bieber is!!!

L: M, I need a piece of paper.

M: Why? I don’t have many left.

L: I need to write a letter to the commercial people to tell them I know what a Beaver is.

M: What?

L: He’s a mammal! He’s a person so that means he is a mammal.

In case you didn’t watch the Super Bowl, Oops, I mean Big Game; L is talking about this commercial: